babies are miracles

yesterday we lost our precious little baby. I felt like I was already getting attached to my baby. we are feeling so extremely grateful that it only happened when i was 9 weeks along. But that didnt stop me from feeling any pain. I have gained a new appreciation for women that go through miscarriages or still born babies. It is such an empty feeling.
On Tuesday I had my doctors appointment and everything looked great. We saw the heart beat on the ultrasound and it was beating just as it should. That night I had a little bit of discharge but didnt think much about it. Wednesday morning I started bleeding. I called the doctor and they told me that they think that it was probably because of the ultrasound and most likely it was coming from the cervix, not the uterus. This was comforting. They told me to go on bed rest for 24 hours and if it didnt go away then to call. My mom took Maddix and I got lots of rest. Thursday morning it got worse. I called the doctor and scheduled an appointment at 1:15. I was on bed rest until then. I am so grateful for my mom that let me lounge at her house while she entertained maddix. I didnt have any cramping through any of this until a little before the doctors appointment. It continued to get worse at the doctors and was hurting pretty bad while I was there waiting. When they brought me back, they did an exam and i bypassed the sac already. He told me the news, i was shocked. they both gave me hugs, let me cry, and finished up. I called Brig right away and let him know the sad news. He came home, gave me a big hug and just let me cry..and eat ice cream :) I didnt think it would hurt this much. Physically and emotionally. {I had very bad cramps when I got home for a few hours}. After a few hours I was able to talk on the phone without crying. But I would end up breaking down right after of course. My awesome mother in law and sister in law brought us dinner and Brig helped me with Maddix.
This morning I am doing a lot better. I got the rest my body needed and today I’m going to be strong. i’m going to spend lots of time with family to take my mind off of it. Thanks for everyone’s love and support. I appreciate it!
I am so grateful for the plan of salvation. I know that I will see my baby again. I am very grateful to have Maddix to keep me busy and to keep my mind occupied :) He is such a blessing and is everything brig and I could ever want in a little boy. My sister in law the other day reminded me that baby’s are such miracles. I dont think I ever fully appreciated that when I had Maddix because he was completely healthy and my pregnancy went perfect. Babies really are miracles. I know that Heavenly Father has a plan for us and that this trial in our life happened for a reason. I have so much faith in my Savior and know that everything will be okay :)